


Gender!stuck- Alpha-Beta verse

by orphan_account



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Genderbending, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-09
Updated: 2013-10-09
Packaged: 2017-12-28 21:25:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply, Underage
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,026
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/996880
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>So many shenanigans it's funny.<br/>Well what did you think would happen if you pushed the big red button Jake?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Big Red Button

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jake messes up the session

Chapter 1  
==> Jake: approach large red button.  
Well of course who wouldn't approach a large red button. It could just be your key to winning this game. Couldn't it? Well it is worth a shot.  
Your best bro stands next to you, he seems wary of this all to obvious red button. But who cares, its a big red button! You reach a hand out to it, he stops you. "be careful bro, you have no idea what that does," he says pulling your hand back to your side.  
You jerk it loose, "oh come on old chap! What's with all the worrying and fussing?! The button obviously does something!"  
"not something that we would want to find out," dirk says pulling your hand back as you reach for the triggering button again.  
"oh but isn't it? You never know what it would or could even do to help us," you say reaching for the button with your other hand.  
"jake bro stop," he says pulling you back.  
==> jake: stop being controlled and push the freaking button.  
You are trying to but your bro seems to be holding your arms behind you as you move forward toward the switch. If only it was that easy. "come on stop with this tomfoolery! Dirk this....button.... NEEDS... TO BE PUSHED!" you are inching forward with all your strength. You forehead almost within inches of the crimson switch.  
"Jake, no, do not even think of-dammit!" he yells as you struggle to the button pushing it with your forehead.  
==> Jake: be a girl, lament your mistake.  
No why would you lament, you currently have an awesome bust and really curvy curves. Their is no way you're lamenting.  
You smile to your bro-er-sis, she looks pretty hot to, his once short blond hair now cascading over his-er-yeah shoulders.  
His face isn't as angled, he's not smiling. "aw what's wrong bro?" you ask giving a grin.  
==> Jake: be the cool one.  
You try but, you see your bro is way out of your league to be. And right now you see he-she isn't all that cool right now. So instead you inspect your body. Your legs are smooth and now a lot less hairy than they were, maybe you could afford to wear that gun belt now! This idea excites you, and you make a mental note to fix your shorts the next chance you can get. Your chest is now very full, and you can't help but giving the new "girls" a small squeeze with glee. You look up at Dirk who-like always-is expressionless. "oh come on!" you say, removing your hands, "it could be worst, we could be dead or something worse."  
"its not that this is bad, and I don't know what could be worst than death, but I just don't know why you 'had' to push the fucking button. Now we are both hot chicks with 'too big' clothes. Good job."  
"I know though right!" nothing could break your enthusiasm, "I mean all adventures have their mishaps and this is ours, although 'mishap' is not the word I would like to use because this is hardly of that name sake! This is quite a... Oh what's the word?"  
"...disaster..." he says finishing your sentence.  
"no not disaster! Just really exciting is all, I wonder if Roxy and Jane are switched too? That would be exciting to see Jane and Rox as a guy."  
He just shakes his-her-whatever!!!-head. "I should text them and ask!!" you say taking out your iPhone, unlocking it and finding Roxy's number.  
==> Jake: be the drunk Girl.  
You are now the drunk girl, and you are actually less drunk than you could be. But still kind of really drunk. You and your bffsy have been wandering her planet for sometime now. You hear the text message alert tone from your phone go off, and you take it out of your sylladex. Wait... It's not there, oh yeah duh, you put it in your pocket. Your sylladex is far to complex for your right now.  
You check your phone and see that your bffsy's flush crush is texting you. "oh haiiiii jakes is textin us!"  
Jane looks at you horrified, something doesn't look right about her, she's kind of hot. Wait why? Why is she hot? You examine your bffsy and see that she no longer looks like a "she" but has shorter hair and a very lanky figure. With NO boobs, "WHA happened janeys?" you ask, you get a little surprised by how husky your voice sounds, you shrug.  
"I-I am.... I lost!" she stammers gripping her shirt.  
You laugh drunkenly, and check your phone, you've already established that it's from JAKE ENGLISH haha it looks funny in all caps.  
==> Roxy: read text.  
Well duh

-gogolthasTerror[GT] began pestering tipsyGnostic[TG]-  
GT: Hello there Roxy! I have an question if you don't mind!  
TG: hye jake! Go ahde  
TG: *Ahead  
GT: alright, did you and Jane happen to be switched in terms in gender? I mean like become guys and all?  
TG: oh yahe  
TG: *yeah  
TG: Janey look hilrousa  
TG: *hilarios  
TG: *holarious  
TG: **fuck it  
GT: oh she does? Does that mean she is an old chap now?  
GT: well that is good, well bad, but good in a sense.  
TG: God! Nooooo  
GT: what's wrong Rox?  
TG: THE GIRLS!!  
GT: huh?  
TG: THEY'RE GINE  
TG: *gone!  
GT: oh you must have just been turned.  
TG: it can't vbe like Thsi!!  
GT: it's fine Roxy, Dirk and I have been turned into luscious ladies.  
TG: oh raalely? Wlel thirsts. Ale me akko bottle.  
GT: what?  
TG: verge jr makes me feel vetfer.  
TG: ahhah  
GT: okay, well I think that is good.  
TG: oh it toted is! But Janey is freaking out because she really wants her girls back.  
TG: that's be sang how are we fjhbc to reverse this  
GT: dirk and I will figure that out, don't worry Roxy.  
TG: let men know heat er fund  
GT: okay then, you two should see if it is on your planet too, maybe it is.  
TG: will do hake  
TG: *Jake  
GT: see ya!  
-gogolthasTerror[GT] ceased pestering tipsyGnostic[TG]

  
==> Roxy: tell Jane the news  
Well you would but she is in mid freak out right now, and she can get a little violent if you try and stop her.  
You watch how she thrashes around in her new body. Laughing silently because you notice she still has her skirt on and her small little chicken legs are slightly boyishly hairy. And she looks ridiculous because she's just angrily thrashing about. In a skirt, and she looks so funny.  
"hye Janey," you call out to her.  
"Roxy! Not now! I-I am so not in the mood!!" she yells back, huffing in her clothes.  
"you do realise you are cross dressing currently right?"  
"OH MY GOD!!!" she yells and closes her legs going red in the face, you just laugh.  
==> Roxy: be the seer.  
Be the who? You don't know any seer? You are way to busy laughing at your bffsy making a fool of herself.


	2. Enter the Seer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> From Rogue to Seer, the plot continues

==> Roxy: be Rose  
You are now your mom/daughter, as awkward as that sounds. You did try to be yourself earlier but failed because you didn't know who the hell you were. Well now you do, and now you are staring at your partner who happens to be a female-alien-vampire turn into a male-alien-vampire in a split second.  
She stares back bewildered by the change.  
"Wha....." she begins, touching her chest and trying to feel for her breasts. They've disappeared, much to your disappointment.  
"Yo, Rose," you hear your ecto-brother call to you, walking into the room, "oh shit."  
"oh no," Kanaya whispers, and you look at yourself, seeing that you too have become male.  
You look back over to Dave and see he's a she now. "what is going on?" you inquire.  
You hear loud cackling down the hallway, you immediately know who it is, though the laughing does sound lower, you know she's probably already suffered the same fate as you and your partner.  
"oh shut the fuck up Terezi this isn't funny!!!" you hear a girl say, you only guess to who this is, but are extremely surprised how high his voice got due to the change.  
"I can't help it!" Terezi snickers, "you sound so, feminine your language doesn't suit it."  
"I don't fucking care how I sound to you!! God I hate this what happened!!" Karkat squeaks, covering his mouth as he sees you.  
Dave is silently laughing, "dude you have no idea how adorable you sound right now."  
Karkat glares at him, then looks to you. You suppose as the all knowing seer they all expect you to know whats going on, you can only make a very elaborate guess which is usually the truth, but who knows if it is. Dave is now looking to you, you sigh. "well I suppose you are all wondering what is going on with the gender switch," you cross your arms.  
Dave nods, "of course, I mean naturally I don't feel the need to worry about something so weird as this, because this isn't as fucking weird as some of the other shit we've face, but still I think I'm speaking for all of us when I wanna know what actually caused this."  
"I would like to know as well though," Kanaya comments softly.  
"well of course this is just a guess but I could say that, somehow by some unknown virus triggered in the game has made all the players the opposite gender they are supposed to be."  
"how did that happen?" Terezi asks.  
"well since both of our sessions have been void and therefore terminated, it has to be the alpha sessions fault, someone probably activated the virus and it spread. Now us, being close enough to the alpha session to be affected by their choice, would naturally be."  
"so basically someone just made a major glitch?" Dave suggests.  
"precisely," you say applauding your ecto-bro.  
"well thats just fan-fucking-tastic," Karkat comments his hand over his mouth attempting to make his voice a little lower.  
Terezi cackles, "you have no idea how ridiculous you sound Karkles."  
"shut up! I didn't ask for this!!"  
"I like how you're trying so hard to lower your voice but it's failing majorly," Dave says crossing his arms.  
"it's okay Karkat, your female form, albeit petite is quite sweet and girlish," Kanaya comments, calmly, you look to her, she shrugs.  
Obviously her taste in women hasn't gotten tampered with.  
"I don't want it to be! I'm a fucking guy not a fucking girl!! Im supposed to have a bulge and no fucking tits!"  
Terezi breaks out laughing loudly, you laugh somewhat too, his whining and his voice getting higher as he does is the most adorable thing he's done since you've been here.  
"you should just chill out dude, maybe if you did you wouldn't keep embarrassing yourself," Dave says.  
"you know what FUCK YOU STRIDER!! I didn't ask for your fucking input!" Karkat yells back inevitably squeaking, slapping a hand over his mouth.  
==> Rose: be Karkat  
Fuck no, you don't want to deal with this shit right now, you have just become a female troll, and sound like a fucking pansy. On top of that your matesprit is laughing very loudly and obnoxiously at you.  
You keep your mouth covered as you stare at the Rose human. She has just explained how you came about being a girl. You can't believe the idiot in the alpha-verse who would make such a stupid fucking mistake. Serious who the fuck makes that fucking mistake. You're trying your hardest not to try and hunt down the human. You are also trying your hardest not to speak, because how fucking ridiculous your voice sounds. Which you know has failed twice, it sucks extremely. You look to Strider who has just ask a very stupid question.  
"what I just want to know," he-she says shrugging.  
"well.... I... I am quite curious as to what a male human genitalia looks like," Kanaya says flushing jade at her cheeks. You stare at her pathetically, she did not just say that.  
"I too want to know what it looks like, also a troll's, that should be interesting seeing as how Karkat is the only available one, and how he is just barely off limits, it's quite a blessing that Kanaya has it."  
"okay so did you just say you want to see the bone bulge, I just want to confirm," Dave asks dumbfounded.  
Rose nods, "it's purely for curiosity, they are a new species."  
For some reason speaking about this topic has made you think of your moirail, who-as of now-has been you guess hiding in the vent. You wonder if he's been turned into a girl too. You shudder, ugh Gamzee as a girl is not something you you want to imagine. You look to Terezi, she has been smiling all this while but that's probably only at your expense. You can't actually imagine how attractive she looks as a guy. Even now, as she stands as a fucking guy! You guess it could be just the fact that she does happen to be your matesprit, but she still looks really good as the opposite gender.  
You only resurface from your stupid inner monologue to see Kanaya and Rose leaving as Dave calls after them, "enjoy your gay-lesbian sex," then sniggering away.  
This is when Terezi laughs and "looks at you."  
==> Karkat: be the tsundere.  
What does that even mean?!  
You figure it's some stupid human thing and look at Terezi. You can see her-well... Yeah her-face quite clearly and she has an amazing face. Her features are not to gaunt but are surely angled and she longer has that witchy look about her.  
"oh Karkles are you blushing?" she asks.  
Oh fuck, are you, you feel your cheeks, yeah they certainly are very hot. You're screwed.  
==> Karkat: Quick! Be the tsundere!!  
That command again? You still have no idea what that means, you dismiss it.  
"no I am no fucking blushing," you say softly, and somewhat angrily.  
Anger because you are angered at yourself because you're fucking blushing at male version of your beautiful matesprit, and you're only blushing because you find the male version just as appealing as the female.  
She leans down some, you wonder how the fuck you became so fucking short, you two were basically the same height when you were a boy, but what the fuck happened to that.  
==> so yeah she's bending down.  
Yeah she/he's bending down and smiling. She's always fucking smiling so there's no surprise, but the male version looks a lot more maniacal and a lot less cynical. Something makes you feel he's about to break your neck and drink your candy red blood, something Terezi would love to do if you weren't the slightest bit stronger than her. But now youre not sure who is the strongest and what male Terezi would do.  
==> Karkat: abscond  
No that would be fucking rude. Even if she is a male, he still is Terezi. The personality is the same, even if her freaking smile and glossy red eyes spell instant death, she is the same girl. At least you hope.  
==> Karkat: stand still hope for death.  
Now that's a stupid command. You are 100% certain that he's not going to kill you. So waiting for death is a stupid and nonsensical command.  
==> Karkat: commence sloppy make outs with male.  
You.... What?  
==> be the blind dude.  
You are now the blind dude, who was once a blind girl, but due to some stupid alpha player you are now a guy. Doesn't matter to you much anyway. What does matter is how cute and adorable your matesprit sounds with his new body. It makes your insides so happy and kind of wish that he could stay a girl. But you know he wouldn't want that, so you make a promise to yourself to make him squeal. Also in all honesty, you've wanted to top in some point in your love life. The only difficult part is getting Karkat to go along. You smell the faint scent of cherries, and you smile. Bending down, man he got so short. "oh Karkles are you blushing?"  
You don't have to ask because your smell is definitely accurate, it just flusters him, making him extremely adorable.  
==> we've already read this.  
You know but going over it from a different perspective is fun sometimes right?  
Maybe not, you are now smiling at the female version of your matesprit waiting for him to say something. You probably think he's going off on tangents in his mind, and if your were so inclined you would have explored it, but that would be rude and you're not god tier.  
You hear him gulp and smell more cherries, you grin wider.  
==> Terezi: sloppy make outs?  
Soon, it would be rude without permission correct?  
"so, Karkles, what shall we do?" you ask, getting closer to the smell and his cheek.  
His voice quivers in the most adorable and vulnerable way, his breathing is ragged as if you two just ran or-if you were so inclined-had sex.  
"I-I don't know, male Terezi," he says, his voice no matter how high, is so attractive. You can't wait to hear how he moans.  
But him calling you "male Terezi" puts you on edge a little, I mean you still are the same Terezi, right? You are still blind, you like to think you look the same except with out chest spheres and female genitals. It kind of hurts being called male Terezi. "why 'male' Terezi, I am the same person."  
"that's uh..." he stops, "it sort of slipped out sorry."  
That's good, you don't feel as hurt now.  
==> Terezi: be Karkat  
Did you just say "male Terezi?" are you the biggest fucking idiot ever?? The answers to both of those questions are yes. And it Fucking sucks.  
You can sense that she is trying to make a move, though absolutely pathetic, it seems to working, mostly because she literally in your face.  
==> Karkat: just commence the stupid sloppy make outs!!  
There's a time and place for that command and it's usually the male that does that! And since you are supposed to be the male of this situation you decide you might. Terezi is giving you obvious signals, but you don't know if kissing a male Terezi would be just as satisfactory as kissing the female original. You decide to test this theory out and slowly place your lips on the males mouth.  
==> Karkat: grope  
Grope?! Grope what? You have all the parts you would be groping and it's a little to early to be groping her bulge. It would be a little bit to weird too. Kissing will suffice for now, she seems to be content with just kissing, really fucking content. Oh god, what is she? She's trying to control? Doing your job! Fuck no, you're the leader not her!  
==> Karkat: take control over make out session.  
You are fucking trying but male Terezi is a whole lot stronger than you'd hoped she would be, and that is really bad news for you. You also find the way she's leading a bit rough, and moving very slow. Though, from a girls perspective this is probably what is feels like usually. You feel your feet leave the ground and your body being held up and placed on a flat surface. What exactly is she planning?  
==> Terezi: put plan into action.  
Be patient command, your plan is very elaborate and you need to make sure that your matesprit is good and worked before you get her screaming your name at the top of his lungs. Whoa you just noticed that sentence, gender swaps are incredibly confusing.  
You are currently connected mouth-to-mouth with your matesprit, Karkat, who intiated your sloppy make out session.  
You decide to deepen your kiss with the cherry blood, and you can hear her-him slightly moaning into your mouth as you push against her nook.  
==> Terezi: grope something.  
It's all part of the plan, though you are slightly disappointed that Karkat is just slightly busty, you rejoice that he does indeed have something for you to put your hands on. You start sliding your hand under his-her(whatever!) shirt and start rubbing your hand over his body.  
You feel her squirm under you, and hear her softly moan into your mouth. You grin to yourself smugly, and start to fondle her small breasts.  
==>Karkat: be the helpless girl  
No fuck that, you're not being raped. This is fucking totally consensual, but more importantly your breasts, which you realise is fucking weird to say, are being fondled sensually, and holy fuck does it feel good. You hear yourself moaning highly into your matesprit's mouth. God does it sound so girly.  
Once she starts going to your neck you hold to her head, biting your lip to keep from moaning aloud. Once she pauses, you almost whine because she's stop.  
==>Terezi: take off the stupid sweater.  
You follow the command willingly, placing your hands at the end of the sweater and pulling it over Karkat's head. She is now topless and you feel her nipples are hard because if the cold and the somewhat stimulation you gave them. You start placing kissing on them, licking the cherry red nipples, hearing little gasps from Karkat's sweet mouth. You'd naturally stop once they are lathered up but, they taste so good. You can't wait for the main course, speaking of which... You place a hand down there to check its status. It's pretty moist, you should down soon. You smell an overbearing amount of cherries and only guess that his nook, very much like his bulge, expels cherry red genetic material as well. You grin against his chest, what a treat. You decide it is time to move from his perky little boobs to his cherry smelling nook. You slide the waist band of his pants down his legs, he gasps, "T-Terezi aren't you moving too quick?" he asks voice quivering.  
Too quick? Well yeah you would be if the roles were reversed but he's just so sensitive, and you've only just begun. He'll need to give you some reward to, you wonder if he'll know how to suck a bulge, he'll certainly know how to play with one, but this isn't about you. You want to make your plan work.


	3. Let the Sloppy Makeout commence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leave it to Karkat and Terezi to figure out how to fix this

Chapter 3  
==> Terezi: make the plan work!  
You are going to! Sheesh! You place your nose where the wet cherries are coming from and you hear the most delightful moan from your matesprit. Jegus he's adorable. Now to put all that licking to work. You slowly but very diligently move your tongue up and around Karkat's nook. He moans ever so cutely, and he squirms a bit. You continue tasting the moist cherry flavour, getting your fair share, you smile inside as you feel his hips convulse and his thighs move closer to your head. He is breathing more quickly and his high moans are the best to hear. You can tell she's almost ready so you stop and you feel her stop moving. He is so sensitive.  
You stand and lean over him again planting a kiss on his mouth.  
==> Karkat: return the favour.  
Do you even know how? You sit up and remove Terezi's shirt. Disappointed, of course since she is a male, she wouldn't have breasts. You find yourself just staring at her chest for a bit wishing that your will power could bring her boobs back. Mostly because your small excuse for boobs are just so... Disgusting. Even nepeta's are bigger, you think. You don't actually know. ==>Karkat:Stop thinking of nepeta and kiss your fucking matesprit.  
You lock lips once again, and the roughness of the kiss is heightened, you decide to do the only thing you can do with Terezi's bulge and thats only because you've had experience with doing this. Yeah it's fucking embarrassing to admit, but at least it comes in handy. You reach inside her pants and find her bone bulge, grabbing the thing with your hand and proceeding to rub it slowly. You hear mouthy grunts coming from her, it just doesn't sound right to you. In fact it sort of makes you feel uncomfortable. But at least she's happy, that's really the only thing you are worried about, you try imagining her normal moans as she grunts with pleasure. This seems to be helping with the experience, and you continue rubbing her bulge.  
==> Karkat: try sucking it.  
How? You don't know if you'd be good at it, and it would be harder imagining Terezi as her normal girly self if you had her bulge in your mouth. You know eventually you would have to, if she suggested it. Maybe she wont because she knows you wouldn't do it like she can.  
==> Terezi: try not to cum just yet.  
That's a really tall order, but you endure. You are really proud of Karkat, he's got over he's weird little you being a guy phobia thing, which is good you guess.  
As he continues rubbing your bulge you start to gyrate your hips toward his, something you do regardless of gender, so it might make him a little less nostalgic.  
You bend down to whisper in his ear, "can you suck it?"  
==> Karkat: panic.  
You sure as hell are panicking! You were just asked to put your mouth on your matesprit's bulge, which you are not entirely sure you could do with all honestly. You guess it could be just like sucking her nook like always, but you wonder why you can't just hurry up and have her insert herself into you.  
==> Karkat: give it your best.  
You are certainly tempted to, you mean, she is so wonderful, to even fuck you gender bended or whatever. You let go of her bulge and slide off the table and pull her pants down, un sheathing her teal bulge. It stands erect in your face and you start to panic again. You give it your all and put the salty teal bulge in your mouth and try to keep from gagging. You her a small low moan from Terezi, you look up at her, it's weird, the roles reversed, but now you know what she's been going through. Although since her weird taste in almost everything, this is probably the best part for her. You move your tongue around a bit, trying the move the bulge in your mouth without triggering her or your gag reflex. After a while you let go and just rub it instead, but Terezi being the control freak right now forces her bulge back into your mouth and make a gyrating pattern with her hips.  
==> Terezi: get overwhelmed by pleasure.  
You can't help but do that, you feel sad that Karkat has such inexperience for sucking bulges it makes you pity him. Though you double back and decide its a good idea that he doesn't. You decide to teach him wordlessly and more by movement. It's a new experience for him, it's not like he goes around licking everything like you do. Though it would be fun of he did. You twitch as you feel a throbbing in your stomach, you remove your member from Karkat's mouth and pull him up on the table. You feel around for his nook and slide yourself into him. He moans loudly, wrapping his legs tightly around your waist.  
You had just remembered your plan, getting Karkat to moaning very loudly and scream your name. This will be a treat.  
==> Karkat: be ravaged by the male version of your matesprit.  
There really is nothing else you could possibly do, and you like the way it feels so you welcome it.  
She starts moving, her member sliding in and out of yours, you never knew this felt so good, you mean you knew it felt good from your end normally, but from her end normally it's so fucking colourful! Maybe that's why she like doing this so much. You wonder if her end of the way things are now are just as colourful or of she's a little disappointed because of it.  
She starts moving faster, and you can't help but moan loudly now, luckily no one will know what's going on unless they fucking barge in. The walls of the meteor are all sound proof. So they can't hear you and all you can hear is the sound of you and your partner's voice echoing against the walls.  
As the movement quickens and your voices crescendos, you desperately reach for a surface to squeeze and grip.  
Finding nothing you settle on Terezi's back and claw your hands into her back.  
After a while you feel the movement growing and you know you are about to cum. Your hands are still dug into your partners back, hers are wrapped around your torso and she's kissing you, moving her hips in a good rhythm, something you always find difficult to do.  
She lets go of the kiss and nibbles your ears you can't help from scream in pleasure at the top of your lungs, "OH FUCK TEREZI OH-OH-TEREZI-AH!"  
You feel her smirk against you and calls back, "Oh god, oh Karkat, oh ah-ah!"  
You pull her down for more sloppy make outs, and you moan into her mouth as you both cum.  
==> Karkat: bask in the post orgasmic trance.  
Well duh.  
==> Karkat and Terezi: do that really cliche thing and turn back to normal genders.  
Wait what really??  
You, being Karkat Vantas, return back to your normal gender sliding off the table and hugging Terezi-who is back as a female-ever so tightly. Not only to express how happy your are to get your bone bulge back, but also to thank her for the weird, satisfying experience. Maybe that's the solution to the glitch. It's fucking perverted as fuck but. It is worth a shot.


End file.
